Some Big Changes

Hello lovelies!

I'm finally back! The past month has just been super duper busy; with Christmas, New Year's, and all of the other crazy things in my life. When I had a moment of free time, I really wanted to write another post on my blog, but I was never really sure exactly what I wanted to write about. I recently realized that I haven't written for such a long time, and felt like a little chat. I apologize if it's long 

and rambling, but that's just me. I am seriously renown for rambling!

Recently, there have been quite a few changes in my life. I have had to become more focused on my schoolwork, in order to get prepared for university, and there have been people moving around. I wanted to briefly talk about big changes in my life, and how it has affected me.

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A few months ago, I met some lovely exchange students at my school. They all seemed nice, and they came to eat lunch with us. I became friends with them, but never really realized how good friends we were becoming. I recently realized how special they were to me, and how great friends we have become. Many of them share common interests with me, and we have done some pretty cool things together. Some of them left about a month ago, one of whom I have become the best of friends with. I can tell you, I really cried.

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With that, and some other things that happened recently, I have seen how close we have become. I would never want anything to ever happen to them (including them leaving, but I know that will happen), and I know that when they all leave, I will be devastated. However, we will all enjoy the remaining time that we have together, and to those that have left, and the friends who will eventually leave, I know that we will stay in contact. I am so lucky to have such amazing friends like them. I know that even when we are half a world apart, we will always be together in the heart. 

Another thing that I wanted to talk about is something that I have not tried writing down ever. It is another topic quite close to my heart. For quite a few years, I did competitive ski racing. I have had some amazing experiences, and being with my team has really made me stronger as a person. Every weekend, I would train. Train, train, train. It was my life. Everything in my life revolved around skiing. Except, perhaps school, which I found just as or even more important. However, I would take days off school to train and go to races, which I enjoyed thoroughly. I never really found it hard to miss school, because I was a very good student.

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I made so many amazing and wonderful friends, who were basically my family on the weekend. My coaches were so supportive of us, and pushed me to do bigger and better things on the hill. I craved the challenge. I loved being challenged and having to push myself to try and catch up with the fastest person on the hill. Sure, I would fall, but I would always get back up and try again. 

There's just something special about going down the racecourse. You just feel so concentrated and have to think about so many different things at once. Is my line alright? Am I going to hit the bump at the wrong angle? Am I forward enough in my boot? Once you are in the race, it's really amazing though. You feel like all of your training has come together and it's just you on that course. The concentration is just astounding. Sure, you are aware that there are people on the sides, but you don't really notice how loud they are. All you are concentrated on is getting to that finish line faster than you ever have before.

This ad really describes ski racing. The feeling of going down that course is magical. Everything just seems to go silent and it really is one of the best feelings in the world.

Now, I really hate backing out of a challenge, but I had to stop ski racing. Everything happens for a reason. Nobody forced me; it was entirely up to me. I pondered and pondered over my decision. Believe me, it was a hard one. When you have done something for so many years, and put all of your concentration on it, it's not easy to back out. I kept thinking to myself, I can do it! Balancing school and skiing may be hard, but it can be done. Though I came to the conclusion, I probably wouldn't handle that stress.

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I've learned that sometimes, it is okay to stop doing something. Sometimes, it's for the best. One of my dreams is to go to a good university in order to set myself up for the rest of my life. There are also so many other activities and hobbies that I want to get into. However, I figured that if I did both ski racing and school, I would spend all of my free time on those two things. It would be hard to do anything else. I always have to do school, but skiing is something that I chose to do. 

I stopped ski racing not because it was challenging or I was getting tired of it. No. I stopped it up because I asked myself, Will I really go all the way? Will I be okay with missing 50+ days of school? Even though it is a nice thought to keep ski racing, I absolutely love it, and I know that if I gave 100% I would definitely would, but I can't. There are so many other things that I have to do, and I know that my education is important. I can't give everything to ski racing. I would have no spare time as well. It would make me stressed. I would be stretched so thin, and I would try to do everything.

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However, I can't do everything. I hate being half in something. I always like to give my full commitment and focus a lot of my energy on a specific goal. However, I just can't handle that anymore. I know that if I did both ski racing and school, then one of them would fall apart. I know that I would never forgive myself if that happened. They are both too important to me.

Then, I decided to keep the wonderful memories that I have, and stop the sport. It was quite a hard decision, but I know that it was the best for me. I have found through this whole mess, that you should always decide things for yourself, and do what is best for you. For me, it's not the end, but the beginning of a new chapter of my life.  I would like to thank everyone who has helped me during my ski racing career, and those who helped me through this tough decision. It has been such a great time, and ski racing, and everything my club has done for me has made me the person I am today. I am so grateful for that, and also for all of the experiences that I have had.

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I have spent much more time with friends than I have for years, and I have done some cool things that I wouldn't have been able to do if I were racing. Sometimes, I am even happy that I don't have to wake up super early and get on the freezing cold mountain in a spandex race suit. Sometimes. It's getting easier now, being surrounded by so many supportive people. Even though I still pine for those race days, and when I see young racers I sometimes start tearing up, I know that I made the right decision. But that doesn't mean I can't zoom around the mountain on my race skis! Remember, Life changes but memories don't.

Here's to everyone who is going through tough decisions, no matter how big or small. I wish all of you good luck, and remember to follow your heart. Cheers to a great 2015! (Clinks glass)

Lots of love and strength,

♥
xo